Obviously, it doesn't be people think it does!
I was in the waiting room of a pretty large office building the other day when I felt a tickle deep in my lungs.I knew from the feel of it that I had a plug that wasn't going to come out easily and was not going to wait till for a convenient time. Sure enough my body, without my permission, starting coughing. Once the cough started there was no way to stop it and so I spent the next few minutes coughing and trying to clear my airway. All of the sudden from somewhere down the vast hallway someone shouted from their office, without emerging mind you, "Would you like some water?" How many times have I been asked this throughout my life? I awkwardly shouted back down the empty hallway, "No thanks, I am fine." Only to once again hear from the long empty hallway, "Are you sure?"
Now if I were a "normal" person this may be seen as a kind gesture. I may even think how nice it was for mystery woman to offer some water to soothe my cough, but I am always somewhat annoyed when people offer water or cough drops. It reminds me that what is normal for me is something that is so abnormal to the rest of the world that it needs to be fixed. While my body is actually doing what it needs to do to be healthy other people hear my cough and want to immediately stop it. Or maybe I am just bitter that a sip of water won't fix what I have got. I try to tell myself that the guy offering me a cough drop in line at the post office or the person that offers water upon hearing my cough is trying to be kind and yet I find myself annoyed.
Anyone else find this irritating or am I the only one?
I totally find this annoying!! It's funny, when I'm out with friends and a stranger asks if I need water, my friends/family will just speak for me and say, "No, she's fine, thank you, she'll stop coughing in a moment". Good times.
ReplyDeleteI love your friends for doing that!!
DeleteOh, I hear ya!!! Although I did have an epiphany last year. Dumb as it sounds, I had never realized before that when MOST people cough, it is to get rid of a tickle in their throat... hence the feeling that water will help!!! That has given me a little more tolerance.
ReplyDeleteAlso, cough drops don't usually help, BUT I have found that the menthol-eucalyptus ones can actually be pretty effective. Because they have menthol in them, if I suck on one and take some deep breaths, it actually does help soothe & open my airways a bit. I keep them in my purse and by my bed and I use them a lot when I wake up in the night, or when I'm out in public - basically in any situation where I either don't have access to a neb (public) or don't want to do one (bed!) if I can possibly help it. It doesn't ALWAYS work, but a lot of the time it's not too bad. In a pinch, strong minty gum can work the same way, though it's not quite as "fumey", lol.
You are right about the water and cough drops helping most people. I think it must annoy me more because it reminds me that my cough is not normal and how I wish a little water would help.
DeleteI agree its annoying but it could be worse. Let me give you an example of what happened to me. I was in a parking lot walking to the inside of a restaurant and I had to cough and move a nice piece of mucus out when a lady really offended me! She says to me, "WOW, that sounds really awful!!!" I was shocked!!! That is when I wanted to say to her WTF who gives you the right to say that to someone you do not even know? I guess in this instance I would have preferred a glass of water or cough drop.
ReplyDeleteAnd yes I didn't say anything to her because I took the higher road!
I have had people comment on how bad my cough sounds in the past and it is sooo annoying! I would never even think to say that to someone else and how are you supposed to respond...uuh thanks? I have also had people tell me, "I had that same cold last week" or something to that effect which I always find funny.
DeleteYou totally hit a nerve with this one! When I was a kid and I woke up coughing in the middle of the night I was so tired and just wanted to go back to sleep my parents used to yell from their bedroom
ReplyDelete"get a drink!!". Nice one. Thanks mom and dad.
What I actually find even more annoying is when people react to your cough like you have the plague! It boils my blood when they freak out like they're going to catch it from you.
The worst was when I was standing in line to buy something at the drugstore. There was a huge line and the cashier was in no hurry and super chatty. Of course it was hot and dry in there and I got a coughing attack. I couldn't stop it and I had to get the thing I was buying or I just would have left. Finally I get one person away from the cashier and she says to me "cough into your arm dear" which I totally had been trying to do. It was the only time when I've been sooo mad I just let loose and told her "don't worry I have Cystic Fibrosis and it's NOT contagious!" after that she changed her tune and started telling me about a family she knows where the kid has CF. I just wanted to get the heck out of there!
I feel like CF coughing attacks can be kinda violent and it is not always easy to cough into your elbow. Good for you telling her you have CF and the fact that she actually knew what it was is pretty amazing. I don't know why, but when I cough and people say things like, "allergies?" or "you got a cold?" I usually just nob and move on. I should start telling them I have CF especially when they are rude about it!
DeleteI love how people close to me don't even ask anymore....even my coworkers are used to it! Sometimes I have a coughing attack that is so bad, I wonder....why didn't they ask me if I was OK. But that only happens once in a blue moon.
ReplyDeleteI used to get, "Boy you better cut back on the cigs...." I would get livid and just tell them I have a chronic lung disease, then they feel pretty stupid.
Here's to knowing that water is never a cure all and sometimes you just need to hack it out :)
As a teen once I went to visit extended family in Arizona and all weekend everyone was asking if I was ok because I was coughing even though they knew of my CF. When I got home I had a HUGE coughing fit and everyone in my household ignored me and I was so relieved!
DeleteI HATE the smoker reference...that has to be the worst comment for a CFer.
People are so ignorant to cystic fibrosis..honestly. I have people stare at me all the time when I cough, and sometimes I'm tempted to cough in their faces as they think I have some horribly contagious bug. I never do it, but I sure want to at times.
ReplyDeleteI've also been told I should see a doctor, or I should take some cough medicine. And yes, some people think I'm a chronic smoker. It's so irritating the things people say because of their ignorance.
You made me laugh out loud when you said you want to cough in their face! I feel so tempted to do that too sometimes lol! You are right that people are so ignorant when it comes to CF or the fact that not everyone who is coughing is contagious!
DeleteI get annoyed by these gestures too! And especially the comments and dirty looks while coughing. I try to have fun with them, like in March while going into a restuarant a lady gave me a dirty look as I was coughing walking in. My brother knows I'm fine and knows I like to have fun with it, so he say's "you did finish your TB treatments right?!" I said "No I felt better after a week so I stopped, but it must not have worked." The looks are so funny! They think I have the plague!!
ReplyDeleteI love that your brother got in on it! I don't think my family really understands why I find it so aggravating, but I should so get my husband to play with all the people that give me rude looks or act like they need to run away from me during a cough attack.
DeleteOh man, these stories make me feel so much better! I thought I was the only one who struggled with the huge annoyance of people trying to *mostly* be nice.
ReplyDeleteMontessori Beginnings story was so similar to one of mine! I was standing in line at a grocery story to check out when I got one of those deep down lung crackle coughs, which not even the strongest mint can help... when the cashier, and I wish I was exaggerating, picked up the food divider pointed it at me and exclaimed "YOU'RE SICK! If You're sick, get outta my line! i don't want to get sick!"
Talk about rude! Even the man in front of me who was in the process of paying had to pick his jaw off the floor.
I think I said something along the lines of"Gee thanks for your concern, but I have a chronic lung disorder, and just got out of the hospital so I'm pretty healthy! `" And then for good measure I made sure to wipe my nose in the most awful way possibly i.e. flat palm smear and then counted out my paper money slowly touching each and every dollar before handing it to her. I had never felt so many negative emotions due to CF in public at once.
Whadda jerk!
That is awful! I understand that none of like the idea of getting germs from a sick person (since I know they assume we are contagious and sick), but that is plain rude! If they are that concerned and they work with the public they should just keep a bottle of hand sanitizer and use it after you leave. Geez!
Deleteits so frustrating, I was in church and had some cough sweets thrust at me by the woman infront during hymn, talk about letting me know I'm being annoying!
ReplyDeleteOnce when I was visiting the Tower of London, one of the royal guards tapped me on the shoulder and he had gone and got me a glass of water, the situation was so weird I couldn't help but smile!
The guard story was kinda cute and I know often people like this are trying to be kind, but I think when it happens consistently throughout our lives it is just a little reminder that we are different and so even kind gestures can seem annoying. The woman in church on the other hand would have pissed me off!
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