Need Some Advice from My Cysters

Along with pregnancy came a lot of job related luck. It seems that job opportunities keep coming my way, BUT being pregnant makes it feel like the least desirable time ever to get job opportunities. I feel like nobody understand the struggles of CF and really very few people in the world know much about pregnancy and CF (myself included) and so I need help from my beautiful cysters that at least know more than my friends/family about having CF. I know ultimately the decision is mine, but I would love some input.

So the day before I found out I was pregnant I accepted a tutoring job which I talk about it an earlier post. It was an easy way to make money, but also added 1 1/2hours  to my workday not including commuting. Because I had no idea how pregnancy would effect me as far an nausea and fatigue I decided to cut back to 2 days a week. Within a few days of cutting back my tutoring hours my principal approached me and asked if I would teach an after school class 3 days a week for 6th graders that were struggling in Math. After a LOT if indecision and worry I decided to take it because it was only a six week course and we have a few days off and Thanksgiving break in those 6 weeks. Okay, so between my job, tutoring, and teaching I seem to be doing fine.

So NOW I get a call that a teacher is going to be out and they need a long term sub. So here is my predicament. My current position is fine and dandy, but it is not the same as teaching which I LOVE. My current position is less time consuming. I work an hour less than I would if I took the sub job because teachers have to stay longer before and after school than I do. Also, I don't have to grade and prep on my own time because I am allotted time during the week to do those types of things. As a teacher this would all be on my own time. Oh and I would still take the Math class after school for an extra hour 3 days a week.

If I wasn't pregnant I would take this opportunity in a heart beat. I love teaching, but I am pregnant and I want to make sure that my baby is cared for first and foremost. As of now I am feeling fine in my pregnancy besides needing a lot of sleep, but I don't want to sacrifice my baby's health for a short term position. It is so hard because CF pregnancy is such uncharted territory. I would hate to miss out on a really fun opportunity that I would LOVE if I feel fine, but I would hate to take it and have my health suffer.

Also last thing (this is sooo long) nobody knows I am pregnant at work AND I am not planning on going back to work next year because I want to be a stay at home mom for a few years so it is not like this sub job will not help me secure a job next year because I won't be there. Also, at this point nobody knows how long the sub job would go for.

Okay after that novel, I know nobody can decide for me, but any insight or words of wisdom? My doctors don't seem overly concerned about anything at this point, but said around 6 months I may need to cut back or quit work depending how I feel. I am so torn and feel that nobody understands CF and pregnancy and so I can't get real advice or insight from anyone. If you have any thoughts or ideas please send them my way. I have to decide by Monday!! Thank you!

Best Day Ever

So I had pretty much the best day ever. Well, not ever ever, but pretty close.  Let me start by saying that yesterday a teacher from our school was out and there was a sub. I am in her room for a few hours a day and being in the room with a sub it made me miss subbing.I like my job, but there is something about being in charge of 32 kids that is just so FUN! So I was talking to the sub and she has been trying to get a teaching job for 4 years now!! WHAT?! That is crazy. Anyway, at the end of the day I was feeling bummed because I missed subbing and wished I could get benefits by being a sub. Well, you can't so I was bummed for the ride home and then moved on with life.

Today I showed up to work (wearing my favorite outfit, mind you) and about 30 minutes into the day my supervisor rushes in and says that a sub didn't show up and I needed to teach a class for them. I am one of two credentialed  paras so they decided to use me as the sub. I was excited because I LOVE teaching, but was sad because the class I was working with was putting on the play they had been practicing and I was going to miss it. Of course I said yes to subbing because I would never turn down anything that might win me brownie points and I love teaching. So I wrote quick sub notes for the person that would be filling in for me and rushed to the 4th grade wing. Nothing spectacular happened and the kids were pretty average kids as far as behavior, but OMG I was having a blast. By the end of the day when the kids left I had SO much energy! I was on a teaching high which is way better that any runners high. It renewed my belief that teaching is my calling even if the economy sucks and there are no jobs. I can't think of anything more fun. One of the kids even came up to me at the end of the day and said I was funner (I tried not to cringe at the use of the word funner) than any other sub in all of history! The kids were well behaved we all liked each other and I just wish more than anything that I could do that everyday!

3rd Grade Is Overrated

You know where this is going...

So it is down to 2 of us, out of 100 and I am waiting for the final interview before the actual real 3rd grade teacher is chosen. 

So I sit down and instead of 7 this time there were only 2 people interviewing me. Things are going along very nicely and about 3 questions in the principal asks me, "Are you even nervous because you sure don't seem to be" I admitted that I was indeed nervous. I took it as a good sign that I was acting calm cooled and collective. I felt like the three of us had good chemistry which means we would work well together and our personalities clicked. I felt like things were going smoothly and I felt like I was representing myself well. The answers were easy and I felt confident. Right before the end he ruined my day week year life.

The kiss of interviewing death came...

He gave me the "I am preparing you for rejection speech" It goes something like this, "I am in a hard situation because we have two amazing candidates that would do a fantastic job. I believe they ALWAYS say this to the last candidates regardless of if it is true I would be more than happy to have either of you on my staff. See above blue writing. Now I stared to brace myself because I knew the worst had yet to come I know people go home and second guess their answers or think of something else they should have said, but don't do that because everything you said was spot on. Meaning you will be getting a rejection in which you will think of everything you did "wrong" Also, here it comes..dun dun dun if you are not chosen for this position I encourage you to continue to apply in our district....and the rest was static in my brain. I am pretty sure my whole body slumped because I knew at that very moment my dreams of having this perfect job in an amazing school in a dream district would not be mine after all.

I know this line all too well. We are not picking you so I am going to give you a sweet little pep talk in order to soften the blow for people that believe it, but for people that can read between the lines it is the worst way to end and interview because you know that you are doomed before you even leave. 

So he said he would let me know by that evening. A whole dramatic horror happened that distracted me from the fact that HE DID NOT CALL!!! I assumed that I had heard him wrong and that in fact he did not say he would call us that night and brushed it off. In the morning (I was still in bed) my phone rang. I did not answer knowing the bad news and wanted to sleep in my happy world filled with hope that maybe this time I would get my dream job for just a little longer before those dreams were shattered. I got up soon after and begrudgingly listened to the message that I knew would make me grumpy for the rest of the day. Got swamped yesterday. Couldn't call. Hard decision. Moving forward. Other candidate. Best of luck. 5th grade opening. Should apply. Call me with questions. Or e-mail...Click

Here is the sad part. One of the questions he asked me was, "speak from your heart and be perfectly honest, what grade level is your dream grade level." I told him I was a primary teacher. My heart is with the primary grade and then went on to a long explanation. On my rejection message he encouraged me to apply to a part time 5th grade position at their school. Of course I would teach ANY grade, but in the interview I admitted that I was a primary teacher at heart so even if I apply (which I did) I don't think he will hire me because by saying I was a primary teacher at heart it is implied that I am NOT a secondary teacher at heart (read= I suck at teaching or don't enjoy teaching older kids) so by being honest in my interview I doomed myself for the next position. It was actually a cruel question to ask in an economy where teachers don't have the luxury of picking a favorite grade and are just happy with anything they can get.

Trying not to be totally depressed I will say I am happy I have a job (at a school) where I can go back to on Tuesday even of it isn't my dream job...

You though this story was over, not so....

Here is where the story gets REALLY INTERESTING!!! He was supposed to call me last night (which I mentioned above), but didn't because he got busy(?) So I sat by my phone all night until a gunshot distracted me. And then another gunshot that fired let me forget all about the phone call for the job....

Next blog, A murderer on the loose (a true and horrifying story that really makes me want to move)

How Does 3rd Grade Sound?

So I went on an interview today for a 3rd grade position at an awesome school in a dream district! I was pretty excited especially since I have applied to about 90 teaching jobs this year and have had ZERO interviews.


So at 8:15 I get a beep beep from my voice mail. YES, VOICE MAIL!!!! What happened to my ringer????!!!  It was the principal calling to say I had a SECOND interview!!!!!!! AHHHHHH! No way!! So I had to call back (damn phone) and I have another interview and a writing prompt (which is scary because as you can tell I overuse commas ..can I even admit that since I am a teacher???) and then another interview with the principal. It is down to 2 people. I am so excited and nervous and well basically will never get to sleep tonight.
The other  scary thing is that they asked some really hard questions. I studied the district website like my life depended on it and I am so glad I did!! The asked me some of the smallest little details that I would have never known if I hadn't memorized the whole entire website! Makes me nervous to see what they ask tomorrow!!! So send me good vibes tomorrow morning if you feel so inclined because I will need all the good vibes I can get!

I feel that even if I don't get the job at least I may have another opportunity next year if something comes along because it seems the principal likes me enough to narrow me down to the final two. The school year started 2 weeks ago so I doubt there will be any more opportunities this year. I will update you tomorrow!!!

Morning Already?

It is 6:20am and I am nebbing away, this is so familiar and yet I feel like I woke myself up in the middle of the night. I need to get used to 6:00 wake up calls again.I woke up a few minutes before my alarm (miraculous considering I never wake up that early in the summer) thinking it was in the middle of the night. About 3 minutes later my 5:50 alarm went off. Really?! I thought the sun would be up at least..I guess the days really are getting significantly shorter.Amazing how spoiled we get having summers off.

I had my first day of school yesterday without any kids. Only meetings. I came home and took a hour long nap because I felt wiped out. Yikes. These next two weeks will an adjustment!! Good luck to anyone in the same boat, I empathize with you. Everyone else probably thinks I just need to buck up considering most of the population does this year round...I am working on it!

School Days, School Days, Dear Old Golden Rule Days

So it's that time of year again. School time! I officially start back at work on Monday and the kids show up Tuesday. I am very excited to start work again because I get so stir crazy in the summer. We had a meeting Friday and it was so nice to see everyone again. It is amazing how much more you like your co-workers after a 2 month break!

Although I love working and feel rather lazy and worthless on summer vacation. Mainly because I am uber lazy in the summer. So lazy that my husband came home from work the other day and exclaimed, "Wow. you are wearing make-up today!" Yes, that is how bad my relaxing summer got! So despite being excited about starting school again I have a few apprehensions. The first and foremost has to do with my health. I have increased my PFTs since summer started. I started doing treatments 3x/day, swimming, yoga, sleeping 8+ hours a night and being oh so good to myself. When school starts I will have 6:00 mornings and a much busier schedule! I am a little worried that I will not get enough sleep and miss more treatments because well, life sometimes gets in the way. When you have no life (read: summertime) it is hard for it to get in the way.

The second problem is one that all people who work with, have, or have seen children know is a huge issue with children. They are so GERMY (like how I made it neon green- a CFers worst nightmare). Last year a few days into work I was leaning over helping a kid on the computer. She turned to ask me a question. We were face to face. She opened her mouth and started, "How do I...ACHOO!!!" Being sprayed violently with little germy particles is not so fun regardless of your health status. Luckily, as I wiped the goopy slime from my face she did apologize, but the apology was not enough to keep me from getting nasty little cold. It is so hard to avoid getting sick when there are 30 people crawling with germs. I keep hand sanitizer with me at all times and take airborn or emergen-C as if my life depended on it, but it is so hard not to pick up what those little rascals are oh so willing to share. I am especially nervous for the first few weeks because it seems that after being in a relatively germ free environment for 2 months being inundated with bacteria, virus, and germs is not so conducive to good health! Who would have thought! 


So all you CF teachers, aids, and school workers good luck with your new school year and as hard as it is STAY HEALTHY!!!