Kaylee Chatter Part 2

• "I am so cold right now I wish someone would pour 100 hot chocolates all over my body right now."
• Kaylee still says aminal and knows she says it wrong, but can't figure out how to say it correctly. "Mom, why do I still say aminal wrong. When I was one it wasn't surprising I would say words like aminal wrong, but by three saying aminal instead of the right way is very surprising!" I love how she says aminal and will be sad when she finally figures out the correct way to say it.
• "Mom, before the earth existed where were all the mommies and babies?"
  "That is a great question!"
  "Babies come from mommies bellies, but if there were no mommies, where were the babies? Like, was there just a wood floor with babies rolling around before mommies existed? I just don't get where they came from"
  Stalling to get my thoughts together, "Umm, yeah, well...."
  "Is it hard to explain, mom?"
  "No, it is just that I don't know the answer."
  "Like I thought they might be in the dirt with the worms, but wait, dirt didn't even exist."
  "Baby, that is a great question, but we don't really have the answer to those questions."
  "Maybe somebody else knows... maybe we can look it up on the internet"
  
  Maybe, Google can answer our existential questions... if only it were that easy!

Kaylee Chatter

Now that Kaylee is four I figured she could graduate from "toddler talk" to "Kaylee Chatter." Same idea, but with the new age comes a new name!

Kaylee came to me pointing to part of her collarbone, "I found my port! I kept looking for it and I finally found it!"

We were driving home and Kaylee was getting antsy with the long ride. I could hear her mumbling and grumbling, but couldn't tell what she actually saying until she shouted,
"It's a catastrophe!!"
Me: "What is a catastrophe?"
Kay: "ME! I AM the catastrophe!!"

"When I was little I used to say, pock-a-sell (popsicle), but now that I am bigger I know it's pos-isil."
I couldn't get myself to tell her it is still wrong!

We went apple picking and Kaylee ran ahead. She shouted, "Come quick! I found a glorious apple!!" Since when did she say glorious??

Kaylee was stepping off a stepstool at her cousin's house, but she did not realize there were two steps rather than one. Basically she didn't realize the drop was as far as it was and she sorta-kinda almost fell, but in reality wasn't even close to falling.
K: "Did you see that?"
Me: "I did. Are you okay?"
K: "I am okay, but it was terrifying!!" (Dramatic much?)

I must have said, I love you to death a few times to either Kay or my husband because Kaylee started saying, "I love you for death" recently.

At different times during the day the ice maker in our fridge can be noisy. No matter what Kaylee is doing if she is within ear shot of the noise maker she will stop and shout,
"The fridge needs to talk to me!"
She then puts her ear against the fridge and will have a quiet conversation with the fridge for several minutes. Some kids have imaginary friends. Kaylee makes friends with the appliances.

Toddler Talk Part 10

Kaylee loves rhyming. Sometimes she rhymes real words and other times made up words or a combination of the two. In the morning she sniffed my coffee and quickly pulled away saying, "Yuck-o fuck-o!" (it took everything for my husband not to laugh).

I was telling Kaylee how much I loved that her eyes get lighter blue as they approach her pupils. She gazed into my eyes and said, "I love how the white of your eyes have red cracks in them"

Kaylee and I were getting the mail when we noticed a neighbor left their keys in the keyhole of their box. So Kaylee and I walked over to their house to return the keys. As we were leaving Kaylee turned to me and said, "You are a wonderful mommy to those people."

A few days ago I was in a really bad mood. I wasn't even sure why I was so grumpy, but I could not shake my foul mood. I told Kaylee that I was sorry I was so grumpy that evening, but that I was sure I would wake up in the morning in a much better mood. She reassured me by saying, "Even when you are grumpy, you are still the best mom ever."

I have at least a dozen nick names I give to Kaylee, often they are names I just make up on a whim. The other day my husband and I were snuggling on the couch and Kaylee started running at us full blast while shouting, "Here comes love muffin!"

Toddler Talk Part 9

Things Kaylee has said recently that I find amusing:

While kissing Kaylee goodnight
K: "Mommy, am I your son?"
Me: "No, you're my daughter because you are a girl. If you were a boy like your cousin, you would be my son"
K: "But I am your son sometimes! I am your daughter and sometimes your son."
I was not following her logic, but was tired, "Okay, you can be both."
K: "Remember, you call me your sunshine sometimes so I am your son too."

After seeing her dinner plate Kaylee said disappointedly, "That was not the rice I was respecting (expecting)"

A few days before her cousin was born.
K: "What do you think my baby cousin is going to look like?"
Me: "Hmm, I am not sure. Maybe he will look like his big brother."
Kay: After a few minutes of silence, "Well, I think the baby will be smaller than his brother."

Squirrels love to dig in our newly seeded beds to hide their acorns so I often have to cover the seedlings with bird netting. Kay was watching this process and proclaims, "MOM! I have an idea so we don't need to use netting anymore. We can just post a sign on the fence that says, No Squirrels Allowed In The Garden Please."

Funny words she still says just because I never want to forget:

Children - childlen
Mother- mudder
Scrambled eggs - scrumbled eggs

Toddler Talk Part 8

Me: "Can boys do anything that girls can't do?
K: "Pee with a penis."

We live in a bilingual home where my husband speaks only Spanish and I speak only English to Kaylee. Sometimes having different languages directed towards different people can create some funny or confusing moments.

K: Are you going to your friend's house daddy?
Husband (In Spanish): Mande? (what?)
K: Oh, you are going there on Monday.

My husband I were simultaneously tickling K
K: Mas, Daddy! More Mommy! Mas, Daddy!

I watch my nephew (R)  two days a week and the things a 2 1/2 year old and a 3 1/2 year old say to one another keeps me laughing all day long.

Kaylee and a little girl chatting at the park
K pointing to R: "That is my boy. His name is R and he is my cousin."
Girl: "He isn't your brother?"
K: "Well, not usually."


K looks up to see R with both hands swirling her kiwi slices in her snack bowl
K: "Those are mine."
R: "What?"
K: "The kiwi. That bowl is mine."
R: "Oh! I just dancing them."
K: "Oh, okay."

The kids watched the garbage truck and after it drove by..
K: "I want to see him again"
Me: "He already did our garbage now he is going to another neighborhood. We can see him next week."
Neither kid budged from their spot.
Me: "Let's go in."
R: "He come back. We need be patient"

Toddler Talk Part 7

" I like to put boogers on the fence by my bed (bed railing)". To my horror I ran to her bed (the crib converted to toddler bed type) and found a booger carefully placed behind each post on her bed railing.

"Can you buy me all these books because I am obsessed with bears." Since when did she say obsessed?

In a busy public restroom, "Did you remember to wipe?
"Yes, I did."
"Oh because I thought maybe you didn't because you just had a PENIS" Because seriously the only time she talks about genitalia is in public.

She cried when I started talking up her third birthday. She didn't want to be three. I thought the idea would grow on her, but a week later she is adamant she is still two.

She believes being three means you are a grown up which makes the paragraph above make a little more sense.

"Okay today we are going to..." before she does any art project. I guess the teacher in me rubbed off on her a touch.

Toddler Talk Part 6

Language development has been by far my absolute favorite part of watching my daughter grow up. The most fascinating and comical aspect of language development of an almost three year old is how one moment she can use words that seem far beyond her years only to completely botch the very next word that comes out of her mouth. So despite the correct use of words like disgusted, delightful, and homesick she also says the following not so correct sentences/words on a regular basis:

1. "Yummy to my chum chum chummy!"

2. She calls an oven mit a "hand bra"

2. Wrinkly fingers from the bath she calls "crumbly fingers"

3. Excuse me is said, "scoo scream"

4. Whenever she cries and her eyes are full of tears she calls them "blubbly" (like bubble with an extra l)

5. When I got home from the hospital, but was still on IVs we watched the Daniel Tiger where his mom is sick a lot. In the episode Daniel Tiger sings a song, "when you are sick rest is best." Kaylee still loves to sing, "When you're sick rest is rest" which seems a little redundant, but who am I to judge?

Toddler Talk Part 5

K got in a fake fight with her rear end the other day. Her rear really wanted a turn painting, but she kept insisting that only people paint and behinds can not. The fight went on for several minutes where they were arguing back and forth. Eventually, K won the fight against her rear end and he..err..she... err, the rear end never got a chance to paint.

Along the lines of talking body, after telling her she needed to listen to her body referring to when she is full or needing to go potty she decided to take it somewhat literally. She now makes her tummy talk on a regular basis and then responds to their needs.
"Mom, my tummy is hungry." Using a high pitched voice as her tummy, "I really need a snack. I am so hungry." Or "My tummy is so thirsty it needs water."
Her other body parts talk too which makes for a lot of high pitched squeaky voices in our house since apparently all her body parts have the same high pitched voice. Recently her brain started talking too.

I called K a wild woman because she was wildly dancing around the living room. She stopped and laughed saying, "MOMMY! I am not a woman I am a girl. DADDY is a woman!" (She also calls me "daddy's husband" She gets really confused about these labels).

Kaylee was coloring with her favorite marker, green, for an unusually long amount of time. I went to check on her and noticed her mouth was green.
Me "Kay, why is your mouth green?"
K: nonchalantly, "Oh, I just tasted my marker"
Me "Kay, markers are not for eating"
K: Annoyed I would be dumb enough to think she tried to eat a marker, "I didn't eat it. I just sucked it a little"

One of Kaylee's friends just became a big brother. It was the first set of friends who became a big sibling (many followed immediately after). After a playdate with her friend Hayden and baby sister, Lila, Kaylee was beyond confused about the family dynamics. She just couldn't comprehend how there could be two children in a family. She finally decided her 2.5 year old friend must have been Brittney's (the mother's) husband and Lila was the child. As much as I tried to explain otherwise she wouldn't have it any other way.

Toddler Talk Part 4

These entries are from Sept- Oct 2014 (so K was about 2 years and 3 months. I am just a little late posting). I guess anatomy was something of interest to her at the time.

1. After grabbing a container of peanuts from her snack drawer she announced, "I want to eat PENIS!"

2. I let Kaylee sip from a can of Sprite (I actually don't usually drink soda, but we were out all day, I forgot my water bottle in the car which was about 7 blocks away, and the street vender told me he was out of water, and it was September which is HOT, so....) Kaylee sips the soda and shouts (in front off the courthouse I might add),
"I am drinking beer!!"

3. Holding her stuffed cat, "This is not a huge penis, this is a tail."

4. "When I grow up I am going to have HUGE boob boobs just like mommy." If you saw how large (or not large) my chest is you would know why this is so funny.

5. "When I grow up I am going to grow another arm and hand."

Toddler Talk Part 3

Nothing is cuter than toddler talk. Their little made up words, brutal honesty, and adorable way of saying things you would never anticipate. Here are a few of Kaylee's:

K: "Mama going poo poo in your pants? That so yucky, mama!"
M: "I didn't go poo poo in my pants" (btw I didn't even pass gas)
K: "Not yeeeeeeeeet!" in a sing song you just wait little voice.

I threw a big frumpy t-shirt on one morning.
K upon seeing me: "Gasp! Nice dress, mama!!!"

Kaylee and I went to music in the park to get ice cream. As we were leaving:
Kaylee: "I like ice cream!"
Me: "I love ice cream!"
Kaylee: "I love YOU, mama!"
She then proceeded to tell everyone we passed, "I love my mama so much" with a few, "I love Kaylee" thrown in for fun.

Kaylee was on the slide in the backyard while I was watering. My hubby was at work. 
K: "Mama!"
M: "Yes, Kaylee?"
K: "Dada is sooooo whiney!!!" And then she went back to playing.

After singing a little made up song Kaylee says, "Mama, Kay-kee is songing (singing)."

Toddler Tak Part 2

K does really understand what the word dry means, but uses it often to mean something that is not hot. K and I went on a date for coffee (for me) and croissants. So here was this little girl, not yet two, sitting in a coffee shot biting a croissants saying, Oh, this dry!!" She seemed like quite the snob!!

Every time she poops in her potty she always says, 

"Yay, poopoo! No caracol (snail in Spanish), poo poo." 

Thanks, for the clarification, Kaylee!

My husband and I were holding each other close dancing around the living room. After a few minutes we stopped to get on with our lives. 

K started shouting, "Boob boob on!"

We couldnt figure out what you wanted (especially since you are now weaned) until you pushed us together chest to chest (boob to boob) and said, boob boob on. I guess you liked our dance moves.

K was showing her dada President Lincoln and said, "Lincoln!"

My husband: "Yes, that is Lincoln." 

My husband has an accent and so the way he says Lincoln isn't really the same was I do. 

K upon hearing him say Lincoln her brows furrowed, "No, Lincoln!" 

Hubby, "Yes, Lincoln" (with his accent obviously). 

Kaylee, upset, "LINCOLN!" 

Me: "Just say it like a white person" 

He exaggerated an American accent, "Lincoln" 

Kay smiled, "Lincoln! No, Lincoln (with his accent) Dada!" 

Totally rude had it been an adult, but coming from an innocent kid it was really funny.

Toddler Talk

I find myself thinking, "I can't believe you said/did that!" about a million times a day, dear little K, but by the time Dada gets home I can't remember anything that you did. I am going to write down some of your funny quotes and keep them in a monthly series so I don't forget.

1. Walking along the sidewalk you found a pile of dog poo. You stopped pointed to it, looked up at me with concern and asked accusatory tone, "Mama poo poo?" I reminded you I poo in the potty and that was dog poo. Now whenever you see dog poo you always remind yourself, "No mama poo poo. Do Do poo poo." Glad we straightened that out!

2.You are obsessed with the alphabet and know most of the alphabet in Spanish and a few letters you know in both English and Spanish one of which is the letter J. Recently while talking about your uncle Jay you stopped mid sentence and corrected yourself, calling him jota (J in Spanish). Uncle Jay is now referred to as Tio Jota (we had to teach Uncle Jay what jota meant though).

3. You are obsessed with your dedos (toes) doing human like activities. You like them to turn the pages of your books, play with your toys and weird kid stuff like that. The worst though, was when I caught you pretending your dedos were doing breathing treatments compete with spitting mucus into a cup!

4. You helped your Papa and I plant a few trees in our yard (peach and cherry!). You didn't like the idea of fillinf the holes with soil so we told you the soil was the trees num nums (food). A few days later I found you holding a clump of dirt up to our raspberry plants saying, "num num tree!" and making fake chomping sounds.

5.You were really mad about coming into the house after playing outside for your nap. As we came in the door you lets out a huge, loud, ear piercing shriek. I sat you down and we had a talk about how it is okay to be sad or mad, but it is not okay to scream at mama. You looked at me and said, "Taytee (Kaylee) yes yes wee wee (cry). No Taytee AHHHH!" Later while putting you down to nap you were crying big huge crocodile tears since you didn't want to sleep. Then you suddenly stopped crying and said, "Taytee wee. No AHHH" and then went back to crying your big fake tears.